The Path to Making Good Choices
This post is a guest post by Amanda Henderson. Amanda is a blogger at http://safechildren.info/
When it comes to raising children, we have our work cut out for us. There are so many challenges and pitfalls along the way, and good parenting is only part of the equation. All we as parents can do is try to help them to make the right choices along the way to adulthood.
You're the Grownup
Many parents want to be their child's best friend, which is a terrible goal. Your child needs boundaries, and if you don't provide them, he'll find someone who can. Kids want to know their place in the social pecking order. If your home revolves around your kid, and he never hears the word, "no," he's in for a rude awakening when he gets out into the world. His bosses won't want to be his buddy.
Teach your child respect for authority by being one yourself. Make your behavioral expectations clear and help him find the limits of what is permissible. Model the kind of behavior you want to see in your child. If he sees disrespect and unhealthy behaviors at home, they will be normalized for him.
Start Young
It's very difficult to inculcate a work ethic and good morals after the age of majority. Teach your child the art of time management; set schedules for work, playtime, and bedtime and stick by them. Good work habits will serve him for the rest of his life. Your child’s ability to keep a tidy home as an adult starts with picking up his toys and making the bed. Give chores; kids learn self-sufficiency and develop pride in a job well-done from having household responsibilities. Even your 3-year-old can be taught to wield a broom and dust rag.
Kid-Proofing
Consider your child's emotional safety as well as the physical. Just as you would lock away alcohol, medications, and firearms, you should lock away any sexual or adult materials in your home. Everyone needs their own space. If you want your kids to respect the property and privacy of other people, it should start by having them respect yours. Teach your child to knock at your bedroom and bathroom door. This edict reaffirms the right to privacy. Reinforce this lesson by always knocking yourself. And just like you keep the poisons out of their hands, you should keep poisonous information away from their minds. You should install web filters and family safety features on the devices your children use.
Show the Value of Education
Being a positive role model that leans heavily on making impactful choices can be a fantastic teaching tool for children. For example, if you’ve decided to go back to school for an advanced degree, this can be a great way to show your child the long-term benefits of education. It’s a true win-win. Especially if you opt for an online degree program. Not only does this give you the freedom to handle your coursework as it fits your schedule, but it allows you to take the time to handle household obligations.
Cut Down on Stress
Studies show that exposure to stress during the formative years can lead to lifelong problems. Kids who grow up in stressful environments are more likely to struggle in school and engage in substance abuse. They’re even more likely to become obese and have shortened life spans. Set routines for the home to cut down on aggravation for the entire family. Ensure your child is getting good nutrition to help them avoid irritability. For instance, make a habit out of getting everyone to pitch in for dinner. Although some kids may not be old enough to use things like stoves and electric mixers, easy appliances like toaster ovens and nylon knives can allow them to contribute. It’s easy to get kids interested in nutrition if they help out.
Most important of all, you need to maintain good lines of communication with your child. Watch for signs of struggle such as dramatic shifts in behavior, school avoidance, withdrawal, behavioral regression, and acting out. These are all signs that your child is dealing with a situation they cannot handle on their own.
The most important thing you can do for your child is to give him the skills he needs to succeed as an adult. Teaching your children to respect authority will help them to navigate the social difficulties they will experience at school and in the workplace. Giving them a strong work ethic will enable academic and professional success. Teaching them responsibility will build confidence and self-esteem and provide them with good communication skills that will help them to handle everything life throws at them.