Photo by Mike Scheid on Unsplash
Every month, I pack a suitcase, kiss six kids goodbye, and head to a conference. Sometimes it’s just a day trip, sometimes a night or two, and at least twice a year it’s for an entire week.
If you've ever seen the behind-the-scenes of an event, you know conference weeks aren't exactly relaxing. They're long days, late nights, constant problem-solving, and thousands of tiny decisions that hopefully no one else ever notices.
People often ask me, "How do you leave your family for a week?"
The truth?
I don't do it alone.
And I never could.
The Myth of the Supermom
I think we accidentally create this image that successful working moms somehow juggle everything themselves. As if we've unlocked some secret productivity hack everyone else is missing.
We haven't.
What we've actually done is build systems.
We've asked for help.
We've raised capable kids.
We've found community.
The only reason I can walk into a conference focused on serving my attendees is because I know there are people back home helping serve my family.
My Husband Is My Greatest Teammate
This probably goes without saying, but Jerry is the foundation that makes my travel possible.
While I'm coordinating speakers, exhibitors, budgets, and emergencies, he's coordinating meals, bedtime, schoolwork, appointments, and everything else that comes with raising six kids.
Neither of us is "helping" the other.
We're parenting together—even when we're in different states.
Homeschooling Didn't Make Travel Harder
Ironically, homeschooling has made travel easier.
Not because I'm gone less.
Because the kids have learned responsibility.
When you homeschool, everyone contributes. The younger kids watch the older kids and learn expectations from them. The older kids help the younger ones. Chores aren't optional because there isn't someone else coming to do them.
Over time, those little responsibilities become confidence.
My kids know how to keep the house moving because they've practiced doing it long before I packed my suitcase.
That's a gift that will serve them long after they leave our home.
Community Is Part of the Plan
One of the best things we've done wasn't buying a planner or creating another spreadsheet.
It was finding our people.
We've built relationships with other homeschool families who understand our lifestyle.
They know our kids.
Our kids know theirs.
Whether it's helping with activities, checking in, or simply being another trusted adult, community has become one of the greatest supports our family has.
We weren't meant to raise children in isolation.
I helped another homeschool mom out for the past year as she worked and put herself through nursing school. As a result, I made the ask most recently to have her come and stay with my kids (and hers) at my house for the week I was gone.
Of course, our biggest source of help is my husband’s brother, who lives behind us, and does not have kids of his own. Essentially, these are his kids too, and he’s the real MVP.
Your Kids Are More Capable Than You Think
One of the unexpected blessings of work travel has been watching my children step up.
When Mom isn't home, everyone naturally contributes a little more.
Someone loads the dishwasher without being asked.
Someone helps a younger sibling with school.
Someone notices that they are out of shorts. Yes, it’s not perfect, sometimes we don’t realize things need to be done in advance, but hey… we did notice.
Those moments remind me that responsibility isn't something we lecture about.
It's something we practice.
Every time I leave, I come home to kids who are just a little more confident than when I left.
Let Go of the Guilt
Do I miss them?
Absolutely.
Do I FaceTime whenever I can?
Of course.
Do I still feel a little guilty walking through airport security?
Sometimes.
But I also know they're watching something valuable.
They're watching their mom use the gifts God gave her.
They're watching their dad faithfully lead our family.
They’re watching probably too much tv and playing too much video games (hey, that’s okay too.) It doesn’t need to look the same as when I’m there.
They're learning that families work together, seasons require sacrifice, and everyone has an important role to play.
Those lessons don't stop because Mom got on an airplane.
If anything, they become even clearer.
It Takes a Village—Even When You Think It Doesn't
I've learned that independence is overrated.
Healthy families aren't built by one exhausted parent trying to carry everything.
They're built by spouses who partner together.
Children who grow into responsibility.
Friends who show up.
Communities that care.
So if work occasionally pulls you away from home, don't spend all your energy trying to become someone who can "do it all."
Instead, spend that energy building a family and a community that can do it together.
Because that's the real secret.
Not having fewer responsibilities.
Having more people to share them with.