Last night as a family of five

It is difficult to express the emotions that I’ve felt knowing that tomorrow we go from a family of five to a family of six. With my pending induction tomorrow I have the opportunity to reflect on the last nine months and prepare as best as I can for another major change in our lives. 

With the birth of our fourth child, we will now officially get the looks at Target from people wondering if all four kids under five all belong to us. As well as the “bless your heart” comments from those that can’t help but judge us for our life choices (not an endearing comment for those that don’t know). And of course don’t forget those that will literally run the other way completely afraid of us... classic! It’s likely that the comment, “You know how that happens right?” will stop... eh who am I kidding people will still say that. 

More importantly, tonight is the last night for my third baby to no longer be the baby of the family. He also gets a new title of “big brother”. I have no idea how he will wear the title given that he’s just 16 months old. I worry that I’m going to shake up his whole world (and not for the better). I can only hope that he takes the change in stride.

My oldest will be a big brother for a third time, a title that I think he understands and embraces, despite being just over four and a half. Overall, he’s been nothing but loving with every new sibling he gets, so I’m encouraged that he will continue to be his loving, thoughtful, and sometimes anxious self. 

My daughter (2nd in line) is conflicted about whether she wants to BE a baby or be the best little mama to the new baby. Such is the life of being a three year old. Most people we speak with feel bad about her being the only girl with three brothers, but if you met her you’d know that she runs the show. Even if she pretends to be a baby sometimes, I think she will fall in love with her new brother and pretend to breastfeed her own babies next week! Be prepared people! She certainly is a funny, sassy, and often bossy little thing.

For tonight, I want to hold my “baby” a little longer, hug my oldest tight and thank him for being so kind, and laugh with my little girl a few more times before I send them to bed. The next time I see them I’ll have their new brother, and life will never be the same. 

I know I will be tired. I know it will take me nine months to feel like myself again. I know my focus will be on my kids over my husband, and I pray that we stay connected through it all. I’m grateful to be doing life with a supportive man, who loves his kids with all his heart, and puts up with my tired rants and roller coaster of emotions.

All in all we couldn’t be happier to become a family of six. We might get a side eye or two in Target, but there will be six of us, and we will have each other to lean on no matter what. Adventure awaits us and we’re on our way.  

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